The reality of disclosure
47% of people did not tell their manager or HR about fertility treatment (CIPD 2023, n=300). 58% of women undergoing IVF did not feel able to tell their employer (Zurich and Fertility Matters at Work 2022, n=250).
Only 1 in 3 tell employers the real reason for time off (Fertifa 2023, n=3,654). 35% regard fertility as a taboo workplace topic (CIPD 2023).
These are not failures of courage. They are rational responses to a workplace landscape that has not yet caught up.
Why people choose not to disclose
The CIPD 2023 survey found the following reasons for non-disclosure:
• Private matter: 64%
• Fear of having to disclose failed treatment: 30%
• Stigma: 27%
• Career impact: 26%
• Prying questions: 26%
• Manager would not understand: 19%
These figures inform how the tool is designed; they are not a prediction about any individual workplace. 24% of people who did disclose experienced unfair treatment (Pregnant then Screwed 2023, n=3,540). 32% of women feared their job was at risk if they disclosed IVF (Zurich 2022).
Reported outcomes include loss of promotion, reduced hours pressure, dismissal threats, and being told treatment was 'elective'.
The decision architecture
The disclosure decision has several dimensions:
1. Whether to disclose at all
2. To whom: line manager, HR, occupational health, a trusted colleague
3. At what stage: before treatment starts, during treatment, or only if things go wrong
4. How much detail: minimal ('medical appointments') through to full disclosure
Each combination has different risk and benefit profiles. There is no single right answer, the right decision depends on your relationship with your manager, your organisational culture, your role type, and your stage of treatment.
The 'minimum disclosure' concept
You can request flexible working or time off without disclosing why. A fit note can say 'gynaecological illness' without naming fertility treatment. An occupational health referral can secure formal adjustments while keeping details confidential from your line manager.
This approach protects your privacy while still enabling the practical support you need. The Line Manager Brief in your Tools tab is designed specifically for this purpose, it gives your manager what they need to support you without requiring medical details.
Timing: when to disclose
Before treatment starts: Allows forward planning but creates a longer window during which adjustments may be needed. Best when you have a supportive manager and the relationship is strong.
During treatment: Most common approach. Allows disclosure to be triggered by practical need (appointments, procedure days) rather than pre-emptive vulnerability.
Only if things go wrong: Keeps the conversation narrowly scoped but means support frameworks are not in place when you most need them. Can result in having to explain a difficult situation when you are already in crisis.
No timing is inherently better. The UK International Fertility at Work survey (Fertility Matters at Work, 2025) found that 42% of UK workers feel pressure to remain at work during treatment and around 2 in 5 have considered leaving their jobs due to how they were treated, the highest rates of any country surveyed.
Gender and relationship structure differences
Women report more concern about negative career consequences from disclosure. Men and non-birthing partners report a 'lack of legitimacy', feeling they have no right to support. LGBTQ+ non-biological/non-birthing parents report consistent erasure when disclosing.
These patterns are documented in the evidence. Your disclosure decision may be shaped by them.